My Foundation

What do I want? What do I expect? Do I want and expect too much? Or not enough? Those are the questions I'm asking myself.

The answer makes them all irrelevent though. It's too fuckin' late. There's no going back. And there's no going forward. *sigh* I tried. I tried my best. I wasn't perfect. No one can be.

But when the basic foundation disappears, everything else is left to crumble. No matter how beautiful, amazing, or breathtaking other aspects may be, they won't survive when all they have to stand up on is the soft, weak muck of bullshit.

I won't lie or pretend. I know that it takes increadible personal strength and trust to give me what I need. And I know very few have, can, or will ever be able to rise to the challenge. There's a tiny piece of me that feels bad that I can't compromise on my core requirements. It's a lot. But the gifts of my trust, committement, friendship, honesty, openness, and respect...are worth the effort.

And if someone else can't recognize that, then I guess they never really saw or understood me at all.
-Kat